Over break I filled my
green, mechanical pencil with
What else. Alone
nothing, is indicative of
nothing that I am immediately aware of.
It counterposes, offsets, analogizes, compares with, offsets, is juxtaposed with, supports, qualifies, contrasts with, is inimical to, controverts, contends with, counters, challenges, counteracts, oppugns, parallels, withstands, matches, relates to, is set off against, and is weighed in the balance with nothing.
Nothing, after all, I can be only immediately aware of.
In fact, this lack of awareness
equates with, or at least is indicative of,
(You see, then, how I’ve spoiled
everything. I should’ve kept quiet.)
“Immediate” means, first of all, “acting or being without the intervention of another object, cause, or agency” (Merriam-Webster). Immediate, then, means slow, not fast.
We are the immediate, the mediators between perception and meaning. We have to find ourselves there before we learn anything else.
Most classes use the present to understand the past or to build a future. Eternity, if it exists, comes later. But I want to put my class, as much as I can and should, on a quixotic journey to find the present.
Ye who teach that eternity defies explanation,
go back and learn that explanation defies eternity.
The immediate is the calm inside the confusion before a comparison comes to mind, before the elemental lead is compounded with — as (God!) I just did here — or similized or metaphorized with — something prior or employed to foreshadow something coming. It is the slow, dumb present.